Two Adams
by Paradise-wolves
Summary: After third impact Kaworu rethinks his purpose and comes across the thought of two beings known as Adam.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own Evangelion, if I did it would make less sense to most people.  
**Note:** I've taken a step into writing another fandom, it might not make an real sense. If there are any errors please let me know for I don't have a beta.

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Adam. It was a simple word which could sum up two different beings that changed the world. These two very different beings were now causing the technically deceased Kaworu Nagisa to re-think little detail about his life. In fact now he was even confused about his own part in the reforming world. Was he meant to fade away and fall into another sleep until these events repeated themselves? Was he even still an angel after all he had died but then how was he now alive? What name was he meant to go by if we were alive and able to stay living? Rolling over he tried to think of something other than streams of unanswerable questions. He was unsure about his life, his existence, his feelings and his running thoughts. They seemed stuck on Adam, both of them; it seemed like the biggest problem in his stressed mind.

Before third impact, before he was taught about anything at SEELE, when one would say Adam he would instantly think of the angel. He had been the first angel and had stood as a father figure; respectfully not including Him of course. He was the first to go to the other place, the first to awaken, the first to die and then be reborn. Adam had been the most embodiment of power, an idol amongst his kind and seemingly the Lilim as well for they too wanted that power. Adam had been a worthy being, they had all strived to re-unite with him and forget about anything else such as the suffering it would cause. Adam was a goal to be reached and his power was meant to be the end of the world. Every other angel had fallen before they'd made any real progress, none of them had gotten as far as he had so why didn't he feel any pride in that? Yet why did he feel like _that_ Adam was of no real importance anymore?

Sighing he rolled over again, the rubble offering little comfort for his already aching body. He wished that in some ways SEELE was still around, they gave him a certain state of mind, he knew what he was meant to think and anything else was orderly private thoughts. Without an idea of his purpose in what he guessed was life, it was a rather depressing existence when nothing was around to distract the mind.

The other Adam wasn't technically an Adam at all. He was the third pilot, the saviour of the world, the one who had stood up for the Lilim, the _Adam_ who really meant something to his existence. Shinji Ikari, the new Adam, was in truth the only reason he'd given up and submitted for death. He'd seen the pilot at a low after his death and then not been allowed to see anything but the endless darkness until third impact had started and then they'd seen each other in brief moments. He admitted that it felt wonderful in almost everyway to lay eyes upon Shinji again, during the impact it appeared calming to the pilot as well which he took as a good sign. Although if he were to come across _that_ Adam would they both be happy about it? Would Shinji break down again and condemn himself for a death which had meant nothing to himself and more for the whole Lilim kind?

Pushing himself off the unfriendly ground the angel, if he still was one, wobbly rose to his feet and glanced around the too familiar bare landscape. The sound of talking was less familiar though and a welcomed distraction from his persistent thoughts. He staggered across the taller piles of rubble and glanced over the top of the crater like prison he'd been laying in for how ever long it had been. He blinked several times at what he saw, there was a familiar face looking back at him and smiling rather sadly, yet all he could do was blink dumbly and try to climb down the pile without causing himself any more pain.

Adam. _His _Adam. The one thing he'd been sure of in his life seemed to make everything settle inside his mind with a look, no matter how exhausted it was. The one Lilim he'd hoped that would be glad to see him actually did seem genuinely pleased about his return.

The last messenger, the one who had willingly chosen death had decided that Adam, both of them, meant the start of life and rebuilding hopes amongst people. Although he decided that there was only one Adam he'd be willing to spend a lifetime and afterlife with.


End file.
